Wednesday, December 28, 2005

Will You Be There?

Just let me be
I want you to be free
Then go ahead, leave and go
If there ain't a feeling to show

If you want to be alone
Just like a queen in her throne
Just tell me and I'll understand
That you don't want to hold my hand

What we feel is not the same
Mine's so deep while yours is tame
When you're with another someone
I just wish I was that man

All that we've been through
I have been thinking about you
Crazy as it may sound
I really need you around

Well, if i'm not in the mood
I could be very rude
But if it's between life and death
I just can't catch my breath

Unlike before when we meet
We're together and very sweet
If I'm alone, I'll ask you,I swear
That will you always be there?

I . . .

I don't feel fine
I just want to shine
I want to be liked
and be recognized

I want something to call mine
yeah you could be mine
I want to rise
and I've got no vice

I want this poem to rhyme
and be a hymn
I want you to be on my side
when I cannot hide

I want some fame
and not put to shame
you're not the one to blame
wish I could do the same

now that you came
everything's a game
is it all just luck?
or am I just a crack?

Tuesday, December 27, 2005

take me

please take me my Lord
I will stand on my word
no one can love me
unlike everybody

please take my life and my love
for it's all I ever have
nobody loves me
unlike everybody

please come death near
I'd like you to hear
now you're history
unlike everybody

please let me go away
I cannot be made to stay
why can't you see
I'm not like everybody

why can't anyone love me
like those so fine guys?
they don't see the real me
is that love money can buy?

I whispered your name
and wished you came
mountains I can move
for my love I will prove
why can't you see
I want you to be with me
when we are together
I wanna live forever
but when I am alone
I don't feel at home
that's what I feel for you
I hope you feel the same way too
but I know I'm not the one
you wanna have fun
it's time for me to go
I won't come back, no. . .

A Friend

(how a friend should act. . .)

A friend is someone who wants to help you if you're troubled
A friend is someone who wants to be needed and be called
If you need a friend when you can't see the light
A friend will show you and help you find the light that's bright
Do not reject their help 'cause they will only feel worthless
Let them know that you need them if you are helpless. . .

Thursday, December 22, 2005

pussy in boots








"pussy ain't nothing but meat on a bone. . .
you fuck it, you suck it,
you leave it alone. . ."

how I came to be. . .

Merlin first appears in extant records (Armes Prydein, Y Gododdin) from the early 10th century as a mere prophet, but his role gradually evolved into that of magician, prophet and advisor, active in all phases of the administration of King Arthur's kingdom. He was apparently given the name Emrys (or Ambrosius) at his birth in Caer-Fyrddin (Carmarthen). He only later became known as Merlin, a Latinized version of the Welsh word, Myrddin, taken from the place of his birth. Geoffrey of Monmouth is thought to have invented this form (as he did so much else), since he did not want his character to be associated with the French word, merde, meaning "excrement."

Merlin was the illegitimate son of a monastic Royal Princess of Dyfed. The lady's father, however, King Meurig ap Maredydd ap Rhain, is not found in the traditional pedigrees of this kingdom and was probably a sub-King of the region bordering on Ceredigion. Merlin's father, it is said, was an angel who had visited the Royal nun and left her with child. Merlin's enemies claimed his father was really an incubus, an evil spirit that has intercourse with sleeping women. The evil child was supposed to provide a counterweight to the good influence of Jesus Christ on earth. Merlin, fortunately, was baptized early on in his life, an event which is said to have negated the evil in his nature, but left his powers intact. The original story was presumably invented to save his mother from the scandal which would have occurred had her liaison with one Morfyn Frych (the Freckled), a minor Prince of the House of Coel, been made public knowledge.

Legend then tells us that after the Roman withdrawal from Britain and the usurpation of the throne from the rightful heirs, Vortigern was in flight from the Saxon breakout and went to Snowdonia, in Wales, in hopes of constructing a mountain fortress at Dinas Emrys where he might be safe. Unfortunately, the building kept collapsing and Vortigern's house wizards told him that a human sacrifice of a fatherless child would solve the problem. One small difficulty was that such children are rather hard to find. Fortunately for Vortigern's fortress, Merlin was known to have no human father and happened to be available.

Before the sacrifice could take place, Merlin used his great visionary powers and attributed the structural problem to a subterranean pool in which lived a red and a white dragon. The meaning of this, according to Merlin, was that the red dragon represented the Britons, and the white dragon, the Saxons. The dragons fought, with the white dragon having the best of it, at first, but then the red dragon drove the white one back. The meaning was clear. Merlin prophesied that Vortigern would be slain and followed on the throne by Ambrosius Aurelianus, then Uther, then a greater leader, Arthur. It would fall to him to push the Saxons back.

True to the prophecy, Vortigern was slain and Ambrosius took the throne. Later, Merlin appears to have inherited his grandfather's little kingdom, but abandoned his lands in favour of the more mysterious life for which he has become so well known. After 460 British nobles were massacred at a peace conference, as a result of Saxon trickery, Ambrosius consulted Merlin about erecting a suitable memorial to them. Merlin, along with Uther, led an expedition to Ireland to procure the stones of the Chorea Gigantum, the Giant's Ring. Merlin, by the use of his extraordinary powers, brought the stones back to a site, just west of Amesbury, and re-erected them around the mass grave of the British nobles. We now call this place Stonehenge.
After his death, Ambrosius was succeeded by his brother, Uther, who, during his pursuit of Gorlois and his irresistable wife, Ygerna (Igraine or Eigr in some texts), back to their lands in Cornwall, was aided by Merlin. As a result of a deception made possible by Merlin's powers, Uther was transformed into the image of Gorlois. He entered their castle, managed to fool Ygraine into thinking he was her husband, had his way with her and in the course of things, conceived a child, Arthur. Poor Gorlois, not knowing what was going on, went out to meet Uther in combat, but instead, was slain by Uther's troops.
After Arthur's birth, Merlin became the young boy's tutor, while he grew up with his foster-father, Sir Ector (alias Cynyr Ceinfarfog (the Fair Bearded)). In the defining moment of Arthur's career, Merlin arranged for the sword-in-the-stone contest by which the lad became king. Later, the magician met the mystic Lady of the Lake at the Fountain of Barenton (in Brittany) and persuaded her to present the King with the magical sword, Excalibur. In the romances, Merlin is the creator of the Round Table, and is closely involved in aiding and directing the events of the king and kingdom of Camelot. He is pictured by Geoffrey of Monmouth, at the end of Arthur's life, accompanying the wounded Arthur to the Isle of Avalon for the healing of his wounds. Others tell how having fallen deeply in love with the Lady of the Lake, he agreed to teach her all his mystical powers. She became so powerful that her magical skills outshone even Merlin's. Determined not to be enslaved by him, she imprisoned the old man in a glass tower, a cave or similarly suitable prison. Thus his absence from the Battle of Camlann was ultimately responsible for Arthur's demise.



Common Name: Merlin Falcon

Other Common Names: Pigeon Hawk

Scientific Name: Falco columbarius

Group: Longwing

Origin or Range: EurAsia

Relative Size: smaller than average (as compared to other raptors)

Average Lifespan: 7 years

Category: Raptors


An extremely clever and ambitious bird, the Merlin Falcon may catch prey, which is as large as itself! Used in falconry since the Middle Ages, the Merlin Falcon is one of the loveliest and most interesting raptors.
Though the Merlin Falcon has an extensive native range, these birds are not as common as other raptors, and unlike other raptors, they do not mate for life. Also called the Bullet Hawk or Pigeon Hawk, the Merlin Falcon has an unusual manner of hunting, which earned it that name. The Falcon will fly slowly at low altitudes or wait on a tree branch until it sees its prey, at which point it will slowly begin to fly after it. The quarry probably believes that the Merlin Falcon is a pigeon or other slow bird, and does not flee; when the Merlin Falcon is close, it suddenly darts in to snatch the unsuspecting prey. The prey is usually a small bird, starlings being a favorite food, but Merlins will also take very small mammals, lizards and invertebrates. A highly territorial bird, Merlin Falcons will challenge and harass other birds who attempt to near it, even other raptors who may be much larger than itself. The Merlin Falcon of North America frequently migrates during the winter to southwestern, warmer climates. There are four different subspecies of Merlin Falcon on that continent: the Bendire's Merlin, Richardson's Merlin, American Merlin, and Black Pigeon Hawk, differentiated by varying coloration and preferred migratory locale. Normally silent, the lovely Pigeon Hawk will emit a shrill, "ki-ki-ki" cry when alarmed or breeding. Each year, Merlin Falcons return to a general area, which is designated as the breeding area, but depart again, alone, after the breeding season is over. This beautiful bird has been used in falconry throughout the ages, and is still a great favorite because of its speed and tactics. However, falconers often find the lovely Merlin impatient and its bodyweight difficult to maintain and hybrids, which are easier to care for, have been developed. The agile, intelligent Merlin Falcon may live up to seven years in captivity.
Because of its coloration, the Pigeon Hawk has been nicknamed the Little Blue Corporal! However, only the male Merlin Falcon has blue coloration on his back, and this may even be grayish. The female is mostly brown, as are young Merlin Falcons. These birds are small, measuring 25 to 30 centimeters with a wingspan of 50 to 65 centimeters. The wings are pointed and compact. As with all raptors, the female is larger than the male. The undersides of the Merlin Falcons are white, streaked with brown, and tails and wings are banded white and black. There are no facial markings.
The Merlin Falcon inhabits prairies, coastlines and forests throughout North America and Eurasia. The Merlin Falcon has been bred for falconry since the Middle Ages in Europe, where it was the only bird female austringers were allowed to fly, since it was considered "dainty". This is in fact where the name "Merlin" originated, as female falconers' birds in France were known as "émerillons". Today, Merlins are threatened by loss of habitat and by bad relations with poultry farmers, as they may steal small birds.

the fire sonnet

Isa to sa pinakalumang poem that I still got from high school. Some of the poems during that time got lost. Sayang nga yung mga raw at crude works ko. Though I don't consider myself really that good, it's one way of expressing the feelings of hurt and insecurities that time, which we (me and my bestfriend, Lei) discovered during mid-high school days.
Bago nagkaroon ng "Broken Sonnet," meron na to. . .


to that fire I'm always taking a burn
but why I could't see and couldn't learn
from the start I wanted you to be mine
but I have gone too far, I've crossed the line
being with you then became a habit
when there's opportunity, I grab it
you know that I am sincere and at heart
but take a look, it had fallen apart
but now that all and everything is done
all that we do then is just hide and run
I've got nothing here in my heart to lose
for now I ask myself "what's the use?"
now I'm running fast for the nearest door
cause I see you don't love me anymore. . .

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

In the beginning. . .


A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away. . .

'nuff said!

I just want to kick-start this damn blog. This'll be where I'll be posting all my poems at kahit anong trip ko ilagay.(May reklamo?!)


I hope everything will turn out just fine.

So, to everyone, you're all welcome to take a sneak peek and have a taste of what it's like to be me.



Lovingly Yours,

Brew Merlin